[Here's a memo I sent out to my fellow employees at Dixon Schwabl Advertising. Brian Piper is the agency's extreamly talented web designer who, on top of many other projects, created this website.]

Today is Veterans Day, a day set aside to honor all the many veterans who proudly served their country, both in war and in peace. As veterans, Brian and I would like to answer some frequently asked questions about this holiday.

Q. When was Veterans Day made a holiday?

A. Originally known as Armistice Day, this holiday began by an act of congress after World War I. In 1954 the name was officially changed to Veterans Day.

Q. How do people celebrate this holiday?

A. There are many ways people choose to commemorate the service of veterans, from quiet reflection to attending one of the many parades held this day, but the most common way to celebrate is by presenting veterans with gifts.

Q. What kind of gifts are appropriate to give to veterans?

A. Gifts – whether they are designer watches, airline tickets or expensive electronics – vary from citizen to citizen, but all gifts given this day share in the fact that they have a value not less than one-fifth your weekly salary.

Q. Are gifts of cash appropriate?

A. Indeed they are! In fact, cash is seen as the most traditional – and the most cherished – way to honor those who volunteered to serve their nation.

Q. How do businesses choose to honor their employees who are veterans?

A. Most, if not all businesses start by giving their veterans an extra week of vacation. This is usually announced on Veterans Day at a lavish lunch held in their honor. From there the traditions vary but most involve bonuses or company-sponsored trips to Hawaii.

Q. I've heard that most veterans are mentally unstable.

A. Sadly, this is true. No matter if they served in peacetime or in combat, all veteran carry deep, untreatable emotional scars. This is a result of the very nature of military service and, while a cure is actively sought, they remain walking hair-trigger time bombs. Yet, in recognition of their sacrifice, as a society we go out of our way to help these veterans remain productive, if unstable, members of our society.

Q. How then should I treat a veteran?

A. Think of the finest Venetian glass or the most delicate seashell. You should do your best never to upset a veteran and you should go out of your way to make their lives even easier. Asking troublesome questions like ‘why are you sleeping at your desk?' or ‘do you think you'll get that project done since you already missed the deadline?' are sure ways to reduce these highly trained combat-ready experts to tears. This is why most companies have adopted a ‘just over-pay them and let them alone' policy when dealing with veterans, most of whose work is slipshod and semi-literate at best anyway.

So on this Veterans Day, please go out of your way to say thanks to the many men and women – some of whom you may even work with – who served their nation so heroically.

Sincerely,

Charles (US Army, 3 rd US Infantry, 1980-83)

Brian (US Army, 1 st US Infantry, 1990-92)